Christmas ~ A Good Time to Grieve
Let the Baby become your hope for comfort and healing.
Until this year, Christmas was about trees and lights, food and shopping, gifts and secrets, concerts and parties, and jingling bells with loud “Happy Holidays” greetings. Try as we may, living in a global pandemic has changed much of this. If you are reading this, it is likely that in addition to Covid-19 you are also grieving the death of someone precious to you. As mourners this year, many of us find ourselves among the poorest of the poor as if ragged, cold characters from Charles Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol.” Do you find yourself emotionally, physically, and spiritually at your lowest? This season of abundance mocks us as we are reminded at every turn who and what we have lost.
Death has robbed us of our joy, sense of personal control, and the capacity to even focus. If there was any opportunity for enjoyment, health and economic uncertainty add to the bitter cup of grief many are handed this year. Where and how do we find the hope we so desperately need NOW?
The Christ of Christmas Knows
This year I have been contemplating the Christ of Christmas. I keep coming back to this thought as it relates to broken hearted grieving friends: A tiny, vulnerable Baby came into this world because it is occupied with broken-hearted people. There must be something inside this Christmas story that is a life line of comfort for those of us who grieve. Is there a clue in what had been written hundreds of years before the shepherds got a free concert? The ancient prophet, Isaiah, once penned;
“He [Christ] was despised and rejected by men,
A man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.
And we hid as it were our faces from Him.
He was despised and we held Him in low esteem.”
Isaiah 54:3 (KJV/NKJV)
The grief we feel, this tiny Baby would feel. He would grow up familiar with sorrow and grief as if they were his best friends. All the while, people of his day misunderstood him and therefore mistreated him.
Aliens in Our own Community
After our son died, we felt like aliens in our own community. Our hearts were raw, broken and desperately needed the comfort of others, but it came only briefly through few and far-away friends. Even my husband and I lacked the capacity to really know how to comfort each other. His grief and my grief expressions always seemed out of sync with each other. Fortunately, our marriage endured that sorrow-filled season. Yet, over 30 years later we still find ourselves revisiting those early days of grief and discovering new aspects of each other that reveals understanding to that painful past.
A Personal Look into the Manger
But I am thinking about you. I wonder: do you feel misunderstood? Are you experiencing a lack of support and comfort? Does your grief make you feel out of sync with the world around you? Please consider a personal visit to the manger. Look into that animal feeding trough and gaze deep into the eyes of that Baby ~ God with us ~ Emmanuel ~ Savior ~ and let yourself be comforted that He knows the gaping wound in your soul, He understands the cries of despair, He feels your wet, salty tears and because He came, died and lives again, He enfolds you in His strong compassionate arms; cradling you now as He once was by Mary.
The One who best understands your broken heart came from heaven to comfort you.
Christmas, The Best Time to Grieve
With the vision of the Christmas story in our sight, it could be that Christmas is the best time to grieve. It is rich with the reality of the arrival of the One who knows and understands us most. Why? Because He grew up to be “a Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.” Let the angel song of peace and goodwill be your personal message of comfort today. In the very core of your pain and suffering, He knows how to comfort and heal. His coming as an infant assures us that He knows, understands and has a plan to bring us a future and a hope. Don’t you agree this is what Christmas is really all about?
©Karen Nicola Dec. 2020
