Does the Flag Fly at Half Mast in Your Heart?
Photo by Eastman Childs on Unsplash
Is anyone mourning a nation that is changing? Do your childhood memories of “Life Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness” seem to be marred by current cultural or political twists? Are you deep-down sad for the country you have known as “home? Does the Red, White & Blue fly at half mast in your heart? I don’t think it matters on which side of politics or culture we might stand, kneel or crawl. Social, emotional, spiritual, and political changes are so profound that we might ache for the simplicity or innocence of the “good old days.”
CHANGE = GRIEF
I have learned that change is the common thread for all loss and subsequent grief. Think about it. If we lose our health, we are required to adjust to physical and emotional changes. When we lose a job, we struggle with financial and identity changes. When someone important to us dies, we begin the path of adjusting to the change of their absence, and so much more. Each of these examples illustrates grief as the outcome. It makes perfect sense that we can also grieve the changes our country (and the world) is facing.
HEALTHY GRIEF
How do we engage in the ambiguous grief of our changing nation? What I understand about healthy grief informs me that it is better to take our grief to paper rather than to fight with neighbors or family. It is better to find ways to accept the loss, while still finding meaning to continue forward. It is better to acknowledge the grief and pain rather than stuff it. If you have never tried it, you might want to give PYSOPing* a try. PYSOPing* stands for Put Your Stuff on Paper. Rather than hurting others with your pain, disappointment, anger, or apathy, put those thoughts, feelings, and questions or solutions on paper. Let the pen and paper absorb your grief, thus setting yourself free to find resolution and acceptance.
LOOKING FOR THE GOOD
It is possible to grieve AND find beauty, joy, and peace. I am grateful for the beauty in the hearts of so many Americans~ kindness, generosity, helpfulness, patience, and justice are still present in every city or small town. Not all has gone amiss. And it is important to stop and look at the beauty and peace that are still found in the vast national, state, county, and city parks. I am grateful for people with the foresight to set apart land for all people to access. I am grateful for the liberty to worship as one finds suitable; for the freedom to choose one’s friends, and most importantly, to choose our attitudes about loss and grief. So while we might mourn this 4th of July, we can also be grateful.
My MONDAY MOURNING
Anticipating the celebrations of the 4th, I find myself in sorrow over the losses I feel from all the changes in America, BUT I also am discovering a new awareness to celebrate my eternal and true citizenship! Since God has called me by name and welcomed me into His kingdom, I am a royal princess of the King of the Universe. This life in America is only temporary. And while I choose to make the best of it, I have a better country that is mine. We all do! We have hope in a pure, selfless, others-centered, joyful, and perfect culture and society. Imagine safety with freedom from sorrow and suffering. Think about support and encouragement existing apart from any negative or hurtful presence!!! That is comforting news for me on this 4th of July.
I genuinely hope your 4th of July is a wonderful day for you, your family, and your friends. Let’s celebrate the good that still exists in our country. And let’s do the grief work that will help us adjust to the changes for which we have no influence or control. Let’s determine this year to be the best American possible! What could you do differently to be a better American?
*a new word that helps us transform our thoughts onto paper without being concerned about the rules of grammar, writing, spelling, etc. For more information about PYSOPing, check this blog out: https://comfortfortheday.com/comfort-for-the-day-blog/2016/08/19/why-not-pysop
©Karen Nicola/Comfort for the Day 2023
