How Important is Grief?
Clean air and clean water are unquestionably important. photo by Tobi Brenner
Have you ever asked the question, “How important are tires?” Or, “How important is clean air?” Or “How important is love?” Probably not. And, why have we not asked those questions? It’s obvious why, these things are all unquestionably important!
Someone recently asked me “How important is grief?”
As I thought about it, I’m guessing many people could honestly ask that question. Many people live out their response that grief is no big deal. Just keep going. It will go away in time. They might even permit a period of mourning, but then use a great amount of energy to push sorrow and pain far from the demands of their daily lives. Some mask their pain with substances or activity and a cycle of addiction can then develop.
Well, I’m glad someone asked me.
Grief Can Be Healthy and Healing
As a grief educator, I know that healthy, healing grief is critically important. It makes all the difference how we will live the rest of our lives.
Did you notice I added “healthy” and “healing” as a description of grief? The other option is unhealthy, unhealed, and possibly hurtful grief. The consequences of the second type of grief negatively affect us until we make a choice to engage with our grief and come to terms of acceptance that grieving well is healing and mentally healthy.
She Woke Up
A few years back, a client came to my office to explore a better way of grief than what she had been choosing. She was a mother of two young children. Her husband/their father was killed instantly in a car accident. She spent the first four years using alcohol to numb her pain and nearly shutting out her children from her care. Finally she “woke up,” realizing she could lose so much more if she didn’t do something. She became sober, joined a group therapy that taught her the power of her choices and started to work with me. It didn’t take long until she embraced the importance of her grief work and made significant progress toward regaining health and healing for her broken heart.
You Get to Choose
Grief is so important that the future of our lives will reflect if we take our grief seriously or not. The choice is yours. Just know that to take no action is to make a choice as well. I hope you make the best choices to seek healthy, healing grief. It will make all the difference for the rest of your life.
For more information about healthy, healing grief visit our store to purchase your personal grief guide called, Comfort for the Day, Living through the Seasons of Grief. It will connect you to the best source for healing broken hearts.
© Karen Nicola 2023
