Who Has Time to Grieve?
Why take time to grieve?
After our son died, people would say that “time” would heal our broken hearts. But I didn’t find that to be true. Perhaps, time simply put distance between Dawson’s death and the present moment, but it didn’t heal me. Time is an interesting commodity. Does it have any power in itself? Or is it simply the vehicle that transports action into results?
Too Busy to Grieve #1
Maybe your wife died 5 months ago and you are pressed at work to meet this month’s quota. There is no time to attend to reading about grief or going to support groups. There are times you feel so deeply alone, afraid, angry, and sad. But the demands of your work seem to keep pressing you forward, robbing you of the time necessary to wrestle with your loss and find hope and healing.
Too Busy to Grieve #2
Possibly your Mom died suddenly a few weeks ago. You have no bereavement leave left and you are facing her birthday with a deep need to be with your Dad to support him. What options do you have as you find yourself with no time off? How can you meet your needs and support your Dad?
Too Busy to Grieve #3
Or your child died and you have other children to attend to with responsibilities to meet. household chores, errands, and school events crowd around like jackals waiting to pounce if you get out of line. How can you possibly spend time for yourself now? Everyone is so needy. But what do the attendants in the airplane say? “Put your oxygen mask on FIRST before assisting others.” Possibly, there are some adjustments that everyone needs to make in this aftermath of loss and season of grief. Could everyone benefit from making some space for each other to grieve well?
Time Doesn’t Heal
So if time doesn’t heal, then what does? As you can see, there is not an amount of time that is going to heal the pain of the three individuals I described above. What they do with their time will either bring them healing or keep their pain locked up in some emotional closet that might already be too full.
What does heal our broken hearts if time doesn’t do it? Well, I found that God healed my heart. He used time. And I used my time to participate in His healing. Time doesn’t heal, but how we use our time does.
That Stink in the Refrigerator
I’ve learned that unattended to grief is like food that rots in the back of the refrigerator. We open the door quickly to get what we need and slam it shut. We believe we do not have the time to clean out the fridge, until we can’t take the smell any longer. And maybe that is happening to you with your grief. Maybe, your life feels pretty stinky, out of control, uncomfortable, and overwhelmed. Here is my great news for you, there are options to start cleaning out your “stinky” grief and find healing for your sorrow and pain.
What you need is a tiny capsule of grief support and coaching via short videos and engaging downloads. Grief.YouHaveOptions is a perfect solution for people with limited time to grieve. Could you find 6 to 18 minutes to watch a brief video that meets you where you are at in your grief? Would you have a couple of minutes in the evening before you go to sleep to respond to a few questions that will help clean out the pain of your loss? Anytime, 24/7, you could access this resource and little by little you could find and make the time to grieve well.
This personal grief support is available when you are — those few minutes at lunch or just before bed. Check out Grief.YouHaveOptions so begin your grief healing one little step at a time! You have that much time. I know you do.
You and the memories of your loved one are worth taking time for. Grieve well, my friend.
